Life

Forgiveness and Female Empowerment

There is this quote that has gone around for quite sometime.

” I never knew how strong I was until I had to forgive someone who wasn’t sorry, and accept an apology I never received” 

In my pinteresting expeditions I came across this quote again, and really started to think about things in my life.

In the blogging world, you are bound to run into someone you know. It could be someone you love, or someone, that well, you just don’t.

And you will look at their blog and their Instagram. It is just human nature.

These past few weeks, I’ve been struggling with this just mean spirit in me of wanting another female to fail, yet I write about female empowerment on here. What kind of crap is that, right?

So I started to look at why I wanted this person to fail so badly.
Was it simply because I just didn’t like her as a person?

No

I didn’t just look at this person one day, and decide you know what, I’m just not going to like them.
Like everyone else who doesn’t particularly enjoy someone, something happened between us.
Something I never received an apology for, and like most people, something she didn’t think she was wrong for.

But it hurt me a lot. So much that I stated I hated her, and I wanted her to fail.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are things that I stated and did after our falling out that I am not proud of, nor did I apologize to her for either. For those things, I truly am sorry.
I’m not blameless in this situation, and she’s not some big bad Regina George type person either.

But how can I claim to be an honest blogger, writing about female empowerment, when I’m sitting here just despising another female?

Y’all, I can’t because that’s just not cool nor is it a person I want to be.

Within this deep dark soul searching I did, while you know painting furniture, I realized that I have to change.
I can’t change what happened between this gal and I.
It’s in the past, and it’s over.

But I can change how I react to it, and continue to react to it.
I was holding on to this anger for so long, and you know what, it’s exhausting. 
The second I decided to let it go, forgive her, and move on, I felt like this massive weight was lifted off my shoulder.

Now are her and I going to become blogging besties and brunch so hard together?
No, we are not. Neither her nor I are the same person anymore when we were actually friends.

But am I going to sit here and be hater anymore?
Absolutely not. 

That doesn’t do anything but breed more anger and hatred in my life, as well as show other females that it’s okay to wish evil on other females.

All females are awesome, and as females we already have enough people trying to push us down, we don’t need to sit here and do it to each other too.

If you are struggling with holding on to these little anger nuggets, be like Elsa and just let it go.
Sometimes it truly sucks to have to look at yourself in the mirror, and admit that you are in fact not a pretty, perfect angel who has done absolutely nothing wrong. I encourage you to truly look at yourself, see if that is the kind of person you want to be, and move on from there.

With all that I just want to say that you control you.  You are also the only person who controls you. You can use that power to make yourself miserable or to be the happiest kind of person, but ultimately you choose.
Make the right choice, own up to things and always be true to you!

 

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